Parenting a Teenager

I have some time to write today. But no clue about what to write about.

When this was primarily a mommy blog, there was always some incident like coming home to find the PC screen upside down or some conversations like these that I had to share. I am still the mommy but with two teenagers, there has been a slow and steady erosion of my job description.

The kids are not only on their own wings, they keep trying to take me under their wing too. Maybe they are looking for some payback.

You need to exercise. No mom, you don’t have fever and you can’t bunk office. How can you read this crap; I’ll find you a book to read. Show me the ticket, I need to confirm the time. Give me the ID cards. Did you pack your charger? Why didn’t you finish lunch? Phone-Wallet-Keys why can’t you not lose just these three things?

For some time, I would keep reminding them that I was still the mom, but then I stopped bothering. I listen to the instructions. I make worse excuses than they ever made. When they get really mad over some random (unfortunately quite common) incident like misplacing a wallet, I use the zooming-out trick I learnt from them.

When I almost delayed a flight, requesting that they let me ‘un-board’ and search for my phone, I thought my daughter would start a blog of her own! ‘Teenaging a parent’ or something like that. We found the phone in the seat pocket after sending the crew on a treasure hunt. She just gave that ‘Don’t say a word’ look, I refused to meet her eyes. I acted ‘normal’, read a book for ten minutes and then silently offered to share a bag of chips.

It is good fun being a parent of a teen. 

It’s also payback!

A Bird gets me to blog

Saw a mother bird teach her brood to fly

Not much teaching actually.

She flew and they saw

She chirped and they fluttered their downy wings

Hopped and fluttered them a little more

Perched on the ledge and skipped a few steps

In a few days they were all soaring towards the sky

And then they left home.

Did the mother bird know that they would go away so soon?

Is she happy that they can now fly on their own paths?

Scared, that they may not find the way home?

Lonely, because they may not want to come back?

Guilty, because she could have cared for them a little longer?

Angry, because they no longer need her?

Content, that she has done her work well?

Proud, that they have flown so high that even she cannot reach them?

Confident, that they will reach the stars?

Thankful, for the moments she got to spend with them?

Mother birds is happily chirping away,

My eyes are still on the chicks trying to ride the wind;

My chicks complete another year of school, 

the fluttering gets louder...

Letting them be

....what they want to be.

That’s what we should be doing. Teaching them to fly and then letting them free to go explore, build their own nests, and fight their own battles.

But as my chicks are trying out their new wings I am not sure how well I’ll be able to do that.

My 10-year-old says that she shouldn’t be spending too much time on her studies because anyway she is going to be a fashion designer, or an actress, or a dancer. (The logic-they are fun, you get famous and you don’t need to study).

I cannot find the words to cheer her on-so I resort to my Loverna-like manipulations. Introduce her to more interesting ways to study, tweak her selection of books at the library, and try to get her to explore more options by enrolling her in a Robotics class.

This, she enjoyed. It was not like regular school. They got to watch videos, work hands on with building and programming robots, and as a final workshop, even design and build a robot of their own choice.

They called the parents to see the final presentations and it was really impressive. There was robot for picking up debris. One racing car robot which had sensors to stop it from crashing. There was one which had a pencil attached to follow simple writing instructions (has the potential to be developed into a homework tool).

And here is Elena’s robot.

She is a ballerina, designed to take perfect pirouettes.

Well, technology is also fun, but she can get distracted only to this extent.