Bits of a conversation long ago, which lingers on, and feels so real now:
I was taking a couple of years off employment, waiting for my babies (four and one year olds) to grow a little more, before I could resume my career…
I could not understand why a woman who had worked all along, juggling home, bringing up two kids, building a great career, would need to quit because she could not manage anymore..
Her sons were fifteen and twelve, independent, self-sufficient, and yet…
“My children need me emotionally NOW” she explained.
“They have out-grown nannies and day-cares. I cannot control their phone-calls, internet time, TV habits through my phone calls any more. I need time to be there now or their whole education and career is at stake.”
Oh, but aren’t kids supposed to be responsible enough to look out for themselves by that age? I had wondered all those years ago.
I grew up fine with an office-going mother. So many children do.
And being with them all the time is no guarantee that they will not stray.
But now that my children are reaching there, I can empathize with her so well.
And here I was thinking that once I go back to work, at this point, I can continue working without worrying :)
ReplyDeleteHmm my neighbour @ Mom's place said pretty much the same thing too. It ws a change from the usual stuff where ppl take off when their kids r like small, but I ws thinking y is she acting like that?
ReplyDeleteNw I think she hd a point there :P
Me too grew up "well" with full time working mother and at least now i dont see any reason to quit working for my daughter> Yet i can empathize with the mother there... its so natural to feel so, to be with kids even when they are old enough to take care of themselves. i know many mothers who left their careers when they were on top just coz they thought that their kids' career was more important. Trust only a mother to thing and act like that!! :) :)
ReplyDeleteSmitha: At that point, I too thought once they were a little older, I could stop worrying...
ReplyDeleteIt will take a lot more.
Swaram: I also thought that was strange. After all she had put the difficult years behind her.
Now I can see that there are a lot many years left.
Sakhi: Exactly. Now I can see so many mothers get off so close to the top they had struggled to climb. The priorities just change somewhere on the way...