Running out of Mommy skills

This is a question to all moms or rather all parents:

Do you get mad at your kids? Really angry, annoyed, pissed off enough to say Ok-Do it your way!

Or am I one of the few who cannot keep the ‘Mom hat’  on at all times and say no matter what you do or say child (or how obnoxiously you say it), I forgive you because I cannot remain angry with you?

As my daughters live up to their pre-teen (is that supposed to start at 7!!!)  identities with gusto,  we are having more frequent and serious showdowns each day. I get seriously upset when I have to juggle schedules, work crazy hours to meet my deadlines, miss out on things I wanted to do, just to ensure that they do not miss out on anything, be it be extra classes, doctors appointments, trips to the library or even a birthday party, and all they do at the end of the day is crib!

Sometimes I really question my maternal instincts. I do not have that unlimited patience and wisdom motherhood was supposed to come with.

We had another of these showdowns today as the younger went on arguing it was ok to go swimming with her cold. After the usual round of reasoning, explaining, cajoling, and debating, we fell back to our same old conclusions: THAT’S NOT FAIR and NO MORE DISCUSSIONS! (Why on earth did we have to waste an hour for reaching it when she had an exam the next day and I, as usual, had a deadline to meet??? )

Next time I’ll let her do it her way and bear the consequences…maybe she’ll learn that way. But not this time.

It’s been hours since then.

My baby could not sleep as she was racked by terrible coughing fits. I tried everything to help her, but she was just clinging to me and coughing away. After a trip to the doctor, a change in medicine, and vomiting out her dinner, she’s finally sleeping peacefully (touchwood!)

I am still awake. Watching over

Tomorrow she’ll be better. Fighting with me again, and yes, calling me the “worst mother” amongst all the friends’ mothers. And I’ll be fighting back instead of allowing her in the pool. Because no matter how angry I get, I am a mother.,,

Comments

  1. Hope she is feeling better today.
    Well, I always thought my Mother ws like one strict police officer. It ws only much later that she realized she had done good by being so :)
    Hugs!

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  2. Poor you. I wouldn't know what to do if I had been in your shoes. Don't envy you at all! That's too much hard work and patience!

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  3. Hugs! I am sure they will grow and want to be a mom, just like you :) I know, coz I used to be the same, but now, I will give anything to be a mother just like my mom :)

    Hugs, hope she is better now.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hugs, HM!! Hope she is better now.

    I agree with Smitha. I remember the difficult times I used to give to my ma, but today I know how much I want to be a mother like her. If I'm even half as good a mom as her, then I'll be convinced that I'm going the right way in raising my child. There's no better example to the mother in me than my own Ma.

    So dont you worry,your girls will understand and acknowledge what a wonderful mother you've been as they grow up. They will even want to be a mom like you :)

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  5. Swaram: You thought your mom was like a police officer!Sounds like me...I don't think I can hope my daughters "realize" the value of anything I do. I might be doing it all the wrong way-just that I don't know any other way. All our discussion and explanations hit a dead-end and then it's back to military dictatorship.

    TBG: Hey. Nice to hear from you! You empathize and that's enough for me..Thanks for dropping by!

    Smitha: Thank you. Yes she is fighting me again-n that is such a relief because it means things are fine again.
    Yeah my Mom was also always trying to protect me and I grew up resenting that. Turns out I do a worse job of convincing my daughters...

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  6. Hi Deeps-I am sorry I missed your comment

    You may be right because I am becoming more and more like my mom-even though I can never handle things as efficiently as she did. Maybe when they have kids of their own-they'll understand. Just as we do now.

    ReplyDelete

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