Friday, August 7, 2009

Name Change and the Identity Circus

In full agreement with Shakespeare’s logic, I willingly and cheerfully changed my second name to represent all that the family I married into, stands for.

Yet, there were so many people out there who knew me by the name I was born with, and it had been my identity for so long, that I retained my “original name” also.

And no, I did not string it to form a three part name (would have been a mouthful and a un-musical one at that) but used both.

So I have Email ids with both names, a Driving License in one name and a Passport in another. All education certificates in one name and job certificates in another. A PAN card with one name and Bank Accounts with both names-just in case I have piles of “black money” to stash away some day.

Add to that my penchant for signing my name according to the logic of the moment, and it resulted in more that one returned cheque. I nearly lost out on a job-offer too when the company issued the offer in one name and my consultant didn’t recognize it. To contain the chaos, I decide to use only my first name as my signature. After all, that was my identity.

Except that many a times I have to add “Elena/Aurora’s Mom” while introducing myself because my identity is not complete without it.

And there are those who take a moment to recognize my first name also, having always identified me with the nicknames I was stuck with.

But then those too are a part of my identity.

I am me, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend-and I use all my names to show it!


Yeah-the Rose smells just as sweet, using all other names just makes life a little complicated.....

//I am glad my daughter as already decided to stick to her surname (although she has forgotten her original reason http://thehypermom.blogspot.com/2009/04/pehla-nasha_18.html)

“It is short, it matches my name and I like it” //

5 comments:

  1. Oh that is so sweet :) But sure looks like a load of confusion :) I did not change my name officially :) But I do have email ids with my married name and that itself is confusing :)

    'I am me, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend-and I use all my names to show it!' - so sweet!

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  2. Oh that sounds like utter chaos - esp with cheque returning n all hai na ?

    Glad u have chosen one official name nw :)

    I hv just one real-life name n one blog name which itself confuses me so much that I hv introduced myself as Swaram in front of hubby's colleagues - Gosh! this blogging is an addiction :P

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  3. Thanks Smitha-I guess we women have so many identities that one name sometimes doesn't suffice.

    As for the confusion-that's just me.

    Hi Swaram: I read ur comment and realized I didn't count my "blog name". Maybe I am still not used it.

    But that would lead to even more confusion

    How did ur hubby's colleagues react when you introduced yourself?

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  4. My God! How do you manage with two names!! Two very close friends of mine didn't change their name, not out of feminism, only because it was convenient not to change. Who would change names in all documents!! But you signing on whims/11

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  5. Not Whims-perfectly logical reasons, at that point of time! For e.g-it was during a test (and yes it was NIIT) when I reasoned that my "earlier" name always got me better results, and so I used that---I guess you get the drift!

    I guess the smartest thing to do is what my Sis-in-law did->found a guy with the same surname.

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